Addicted

Addicted is a word that is typically not associated with positive attributes. We typically associate addictions as harmful, negative, and devastating aspects of a habit that can not easily be reversed. Recently, I have been a witness to the positive side of being addicted. For a couple of weeks now there has been a ladies class on Monday night called “More than Sisters” at Missouri Street Church. Several Wonder City Members have become part of this class. While I have planned to attend, I have yet to have the opportunity. However, I have received phone calls about the “addictiveness” of this class. Phrases like “Oooh, you need to come to this class,” and “I can’t believe how I love going to this class,” are spoken as encouragement for others at Wonder City to attend. Last Wednesday night, the ladies that are attending were so pumped up, they were excited about being able to share, laugh, and learn about God in a way that is truly focused on Women in Christ, who struggle in today’s world. Linda even stated that she was going to hate missing a class, but in the event that she missed, she would get the materials from anyone who is willing to share. She even stated that she herself is “addicted” to this class. Being able to bring ladies, of all ages and backgrounds, together is an awesome thing. I know that every Monday night, God looks down and smiles because his power is creating an addiction that is positive and it is consuming the ladies at Wonder City who have made the decision to be “More than Sisters.”

Written by: Amy McFarland

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One of the amazing aspects of this ladies class on Monday nights has been the Acts 2:42-47 nature of the class. It has been reported to me that one of the things the class hopes to do is take care of the needs within the class. Participants have the opportunity to write prayer requests and needs on a card. Then as the class has the means and ability to address the needs, they are taken care of. Last week—right as Amy and I were preparing to leave for vacation—the class facilitator called me and told me they were going to take care of a need that a Wonder City participant had. This is an older lady who lives in an old apartment that does not have central heat and air. Her window AC unit had gone out. She put on her prayer card that God would provide an AC. The group from the class found not one, but two units for her. When they called to set up delivery, they discovered they were too late. God had already provided two units through a family member. God showed up and he showed out! This is just the tip of the iceberg of what I have been hearing that God is doing through this group of ladies. True Christian community is being formed and is having an impact.

A Success Story?

It is too early to know just how much of an impact has been made this past school year. Through the quiet generosity of several individuals a 2nd grader from Wonder City was able to attend West Memphis Christian this school year. Earlier this week we received a note from her teacher, telling us the great progress this student made academically. Her reading level has gone from 1.3 to 2.3! While she is still slightly behind where she needs to be—she has progressed a whole reading level during the course of a school year. She has also completed 13 levels on Math Facts in a Flash. However, I believe that her accomplishments academically pale in comparison to what has been accomplished spiritually. After school every day she has been coming to the church office to wait on her day care van to pick her up. For the past couple of weeks (at least that is how long I have heard her) she has been signing Christian songs like Sanctuary and Someday. Here is a young girl, singing “Oh Lord prepare me, to be a sanctuary…” all on her own. She doesn’t care who is around or who hears her! This combination of education and love of Jesus is exactly what it will take to break the cycles of poverty in the lives of many served by Wonder City. Sadly, at this point this child’s mother has decided to return her to public school next year. It is my hope and prayer that God will take this one year and use it as a base that will propel her throughout the rest of her life. But, I am also praying that her mother changes her mind!

"New" Worship Space

As I mentioned a couple weeks ago, some men from Missouri Street's Just Brother's Monday night men's Bible study group came to Wonder City April 21, for a service project to improve our worship facility. I finally have the pictures together to share. Here are the before pictures of what the building used to look like.

These are the pictures from the men working at the building. (some pictures were taken with a disposable camera and are not the best quality)

Finally, the "finished" project (some things still need finished--however, it is much better than what is was before). A special thanks to Lyndal Dale, Don Hilburn, and David Arnold for coming down everyday the following week to finish up. Also a special thanks to the C.I.A. (Christianity In Action) group who came this past Sunday and did even more work.

Combined Worship

Sunday, April 22, was a great day for Wonder City and Missouri Street—we held our first ever combined worship service. The worship service itself I can’t describe. This was not the first time I have been in a Church of Christ that has intentionally held services with a congregation of a different predominate race that sought to appeal to both cultures. The worship in that setting is something that simply has to be experienced. God was in the house that morning! I know that God is always in the worship of his people—but there are those days and times where you know it more than because that is simply what you believe, you know it because you experienced it. That is exactly what happened almost two weeks ago. We worshiped and enjoyed a fellowship meal together. Christians who normally don’t associate with each other from different cultures and socio-economic backgrounds were together worshipping their Lord and sharing life together. I still have not stopped hearing positive things about worship that Sunday morning from both Missouri Street members and Wonder City members. Praise God for tearing barriers down.

Web Page

Take a minute and check out Wonder City's page on the Memphis Urban Mininstry website.

http://www.memphisurbanministry.com/WCCpage.html

Our website has been delayed due to the inability to find a volunteer who knows enough to put together and maintain a good website for Wonder City. In the meantime though, this website along with my blog here will serve as our source for web information about Wonder City.

Currently on this webpage is a short video I did for a church in Memphis about our need for a new facility to call home. (Actually, I didn't do any part of it. Someone came and taped me speaking and then went and put it together.) Check it out anyway!

Community

This weekend is all about community. Specifically, it is about building community between Missouri Street Church of Christ and Wonder City Church. Reflecting on the shooting that took place this past Monday at Virginia Tech Larry James wrote about the need for community on his blog.

The purpose of community building and community development is to see that everyone has a chance to be connected in a meaningful, enduring manner to at least a few other people...Building community must remain our clear mission, informing everything we do in the city. Our work cannot be just about charity or compassion or "helping" people. It cannot be fundamentally about providing people volunteer opportunities. The basis of what we seek to accomplish is fundamentally not about feeding people, housing people, healing people or educating people. We must go further. While we may decide to use activities like these to do part of our work, and while such actions often will prove necessary, our goal must always be to connect people to one another for improved well being and for the experience of authentic, human community.

This weekend there are several activities that will be used to build community between parent and daughter church. First, a group of men from the Just Brothers men's Bible study is going to come on Saturday and work on our building to make it more of a place to worship and learn about God. Secondly, Missouri Street and Wonder City will have a combined worship service on Sunday-the first in the 7 1/2 years of Wonder City. It is our goal and hope that these activities will serve as a catalyst for community development and growth between these two communities. I will write more next week and let you know my impressions of the weekend.

Spring & Summer Clothing Giveaway Report

On March 22, Wonder City served the community by giving away the clothes that were donated for our Spring and Summer Clothing Giveaway. 39 individuals came through and received clothes for 117 people. Part of what we do at any of our outreach service events is ask the community what they need spiritually from Wonder City. Options include prayer, to be picked up for services on Sunday and/or Wednesday, and an in-home Bible study. 35 of those who came through requested that Wonder City simply pray for them. One (other than current church members) also requested to have an in-home Bible study. Please take time this week and lift these people up to the Father in prayer. Their names are

Ellen Jones
Tammy White
Ovella Wilson
Domique Davis
Anna Duniquian
Torchee
Erinstin Tucker
Tomeka Duniqian
Francis Cheers
Mattie Miller
Delores Foy
Kawanna Sims
Estella Bennett
Annie Simes
Kiria Moore
Antony
Sharon Hall
Dela Tucker
Lattie
Beaty Bradly
Trisha Davis
Joyce Miller
Monica Watson
Veler Smith
Vella Smith
Ann Rodgers
Mary Ann Rozie
Jerrod McClure
LaShunda Foster
Jorcia
Lievia Ceaston
Johnny Davis
Barbara Andrews
Linda Long
LaShawn Williams

The one who also requested an in-home Bible study is LaShawn Williams.

Way Too Busy

Life has been way too busy recently (part of the reason I haven't posted in so long). I sat down yesterday and was thinking about everything that I had to get done. Here is what I wrote.

Thursday morning (3/29)-It is Thursday and I haven't started my sermon for Sunday yet. I have several meetings today which will limit my time to work on it today. Tomorrow we are having internet installed at the house and our new bedroom furniture is being delivered. Amy will be gone on Saturday visiting her mother and attending a lady's day. However, there is a gathering of my friends on Saturday from 9 to 4 I want to attend. Saturday evening at 5pm I have a Just Brothers fish fry. When/How will it all get done?

Here it is Friday night and I think that I am not going to make my gathering of friends. I need to stay home and take the time while Amy is gone to work on my sermon. The problem is that this is how life has been for me recently. I am need to slow down. I need to learn to say "no."

Building Update

Back in early December I posted about a couple of things that Wonder City needs to be able to grow. (Go to http://urbanminista.blogspot.com/2006/12/needed-for-growth.html to read the post). One of those was a larger facility. I mentioned that there was a proposal before the Missouri Street elders to purchase the First Church of the Nazarene as a new home for Wonder City.

At that time the elders were in the process of adding new elders and decided to wait until they were on board to make a decision. Two new elders have now been added and they are ready to move forward with making a decision. Although nothing is official at this point, everything looks positive. I have met with them several times to discuss the building and answer questions. I have also met with several of them individually over the past couple of months.

Please continue to pray that God’s will will be done. I am hopeful that we will be in our “new” building no later than middle July.

Depending On God

This week I was speaking with a Missouri Street church member who was asked by another church member, “Do you depend on God in all areas of your life?” At first he answered, “Yes.” When pressed on the issue he had to admit that he didn’t. His wife had cooked his breakfast that morning and he hadn’t depended on God to provide for his physical needs. He had to admit that he only depended on God for the spiritual areas of his life. My guess is that is true for most middle-class Americans. Even if we live paycheck to paycheck we still don’t have to rely on God for our physical needs. We have our jobs and we know that we will have food on the table every meal. It may not be a fancy meal, but there will be food on the table, clothes on our backs, and roofs over our heads.

However, it is the opposite for those ministered to by Wonder City. They depend on God to meet their every physical need. The challenge for them is to depend on him for their spiritual needs as well. Many we minister to don’t know where their next meal is coming from. Many don’t know where they will sleep that night. I have even noticed this year how many people are wearing lightweight, early fall or late spring, jackets during these extremely cold winter days—because that is all they have. They depend on God for everything they have—from the shoes on their feet, food on their tables, and clothes on their backs (as one song we sing says).

However, for the poor to depend on God spiritually is another story. Addictions run rampant in our neighborhood. Addictions to drugs and alcohol are the most evident. But, there is also gambling and sex addictions as well. These are used as coping mechanisms for the daily struggles of life. When life gets to be too much to handle, many in our neighborhood turn to these vices to escape reality. The bottle or the joint becomes the spiritual answer to life’s problems—not God. Every Sunday we have a time for church members to stand up and say what God has done for them that week. Over and over again we here things like—“healed me, paid this or that bill, etc.” Rarely do we hear—“forgave my sins,” or some other spiritual answer. However, in my experience in more traditional church settings this is exactly the answer that is given, and rarely does someone answer “by putting food on my table this morning.”

As this distinction was brought to the forefront of my mind again, I realized that the struggle for each one of us to is put God first in all areas of our lives. Where we struggle is different for each of us based on where we are in life. Some need to hear the words of Jesus found in Matthew 6:33, “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things (the physical needs Jesus spoke of in verses 25-32) will be given to you as well.” Others need to hear what Jesus said to the rich ruler, “Sell everything you have and give to the poor and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me” (Lk. 18:22). The rich ruler needed to learn dependence on God for his physical needs and not rely on his wealth.

I would like to challenge your dependence on God, as mine has been challenged by this question. Do you depend on God in all areas of your life? Are there areas where you depend on something or someone, instead of God to fulfill your needs? As you ask yourself these questions, take note of the areas in which dependence on God is lacking, and strive to depend on God in every aspect of your life.

A Commitment Fulfilled

Back in the summer of 2003, Amy and I didn’t know what God had in store for us. We had made the commitment to Wonder City to finish the year. By that time I would have also completed graduate school. But then what? We would be free to go anywhere in the country we felt God leading us. At the same time we weren’t sure God was calling us to leave. And we weren’t sure that he was calling us to stay long-term at Wonder City. So after praying about it and having several conversations, we made the decision to stay and go full-time with Wonder City in January, 2004. We decided that we would make a three-year commitment. We figured that would give us enough time to further seek God’s will, and would allow us to make necessary preparations if he was calling us to plant a church somewhere else .

The lessons that I have learned through this process over the past three years are patience and dependence upon God. There is a saying in the neighborhood, “God may not come when you want him, but he will always be right on time.” The first year-and-a-half was very tough for Amy and me. There was no financial backing to our full-time work from Missouri Street. I had to raise my whole salary. Things for several months didn’t look good. In fact, only a few people know that during the summer of 2004, I sent a resume to a church that was looking to hire an Outreach Minister. I didn’t see how Amy and I could make it the way things were looking. Nothing materialized out of that resume, and Missouri Street also stepped up with some money. We were making it, but barely. The three year commitment still loomed over us. Would we be able to fulfill it? Would we have to go elsewhere? We loved Wonder City, but also had to do what was best for our financial future and stability.

Then the news came in early June, 2005 that the Mauldin’s were leaving. That changed everything for us. The elders at Missouri Street asked me to be the Interim Director for Wonder City. With that came more compensation. Then in November, 2005, they asked me to remove Interim from my job title. Again, financially things looked even better for us. God was making himself known to us and what he wanted for Amy and me. It would have been nice to know what God’s will for us was back in 2003. But without the process, the ride wouldn’t have been as much fun and the lessons that Amy and I have learned would have gone unlearned.

As I was lying in bed Monday night, I realized that commitment we made has now been fulfilled. I haven’t thought about that commitment much since the summer of 2005 when the Mauldin’s told us they were leaving. We now know that God wants us here at Wonder City. How long, only God knows. But we are not looking to leave. We love being in Arkansas. We love being at Missouri Street. We love being at Wonder City.

The Pursuit of Happyness

Amy and I are normally suckers for movies with inspirational messages. We love movies like Remember the Titans; Radio; and Akeelah and the Bee. So when we first saw the previews for the new Will Smith movie, The Pursuit of Happyness, we both immediately wanted to see it. However, after seeing the movie this past Saturday, I wasn’t thrilled with it.

There are very positive messages in the movie. Will Smith’s character (Chris Gardner) talks about not knowing who his dad was until he was 28 years old but that his son would grow up knowing him. Throughout the movie Chris is making sure he maintains his relationship with his son—even when his wife/girlfriend (the movie never really tells) leaves and moves across the country. There is also a scene in the movie where Chris has just told his son, who loves basketball, that he will probably not be any good at it. Chris’ son immediately puts his ball away and is ready to leave the court. He realizes what he has done and then tells his son to never let anyone tell him he can’t do something—even his own dad.

However, the overall message of the movie is what I disagree with. The message of the movie is that money is the key to happiness. Do whatever it takes to be successful—including cheating and lying. The movie teaches that everything is up to you if you are going to be successful and happy.

These messages are all contrary to the gospel message. Christ teaches that because of sin we can’t do it by ourselves. Doing it ourselves and our way and not relying on God has gotten us into the mess we as a human race are in. Christianity is not a “pick yourself up by your bootstraps” religion. We are dependent upon God, the blood of Jesus, and fellowship of fellow Christians to be “successful.”

Jesus teaches that we cannot serve two masters. We cannot serve both God and money (Matthew 6:24). Those who have served money have stated how empty it left them feeling and no mater how much they had they always wanted more.

If the movie makers really wanted an inspirational story about the key to happiness they would have found one with a very Christian theme—forgiveness. According to a December, 2002, USA Today article “‘Materialism is toxic for happiness,’ says University of Illinois psychologist Ed Diener. Even rich materialists aren't as happy as those who care less about getting and spending. The article also quoted University of Michigan psychologist Christopher Peterson, who indicated forgiveness is the trait most strongly linked to happiness. Peterson said, ‘It's the queen of all virtues, and probably the hardest to come by.’ ”

Vacation

Last week I was on a much needed vacation. I did abosulely nothing!!!

Well that's not entirely true. I read a book Amy gave me for Christmas--Clive Cussler's The Treasure of Khan. (Cussler is my favorite author and has written many books with a central character--Dirk Pitt. His Pitt novel Sahara was turned into a major motion picture.) I also watched as much of the 4th day of 24 as I could. I love 24 and Jack Bauer. I was hoping to watch all of season 4 and 5 before this season starts, but I don't think I am going to make it. I still have 2.5 hours of day 4 to finish. And lots of ESPN! But other than that--nothing. Just books and TV. It was great!

Yesterday, it was back to the grind though. Although, I was ready to get back to work. So here I am back at work. This looks like one of the busiest January and Februarys in several years. More on that later.

Honoring My Grandma

Christmas week was tough, but God brought us through it. Now that a few days have passed I want to take a minute and honor my Grandma and tell the world why I love my Grandma so much. I originally wrote the following for the Missourit Street Church of Christ bulletin (Jan 7, 2007) slightly edited for the different context.

As the family gathered over Christmas week to honor and remember my Grandma several things stuck out to me. First, my Grandma was a person who deeply loved her family. This was demonstrated in many ways. She made it a point to be at anything that was important to her family. She was at both my graduation from college and graduate school and at my wedding to Amy. She did the same for my sisters. I heard other family members talk about their special events that she made it a point to be at. She also showed her love by sending us cards on our special days—birthdays, anniversaries, etc. She never missed one. In fact, my Grandma would mail over 1000 cards per year—all at her own expense.

Second, was her Christ-like character. She never complained. No one in the family ever remembers her complaining about anything. Even in her last days when she was in pain all she would say was, “God is in control.” When we were children running around her house, Grandma would never get on to us—Grandpa, that’s another story—but not Grandma. In fact, several of us made a decision while at Grandma’s celebrating her life that we were going to strive to follow her example more by not being complainers.

Why else did I love my Grandma. Well, simply because she was my Grandma! I will miss her. I will miss her enthusiasm for life and her humor. (Remind me to tell you the Y2K and “Happy New Ear” stories sometime.) I will miss her at all the important events in my life in the future. I will miss seeing Christ through her. However, I know that she is now with Christ, and I look forward to the day when I will see her again.

Thank you to everyone who has prayed for me and my family over the past two weeks.

Christmas Shoes

I have never liked the song "Christmas Shoes." I don't really don't know why. It may be due to the fact that Christmas is supposed to be a happy ocasion with family and friends and that song focuses on a more depressing event. However, I now understand that song with an understanding I wish I didn't have. To use the lyrics from the song...

My Grandma went to meet Jesus this morning.

I have cried a couple times today already and I am sure that I will cry some more. But as my mom said this morning when she told me, "Grandma got the best Christmas gift of all...she went home." I miss her already. I miss that she will never know her great-grandkids that Amy and I will have one day. I miss her warm smile and unconditional love. But I am thankful that she is not suffering. To borrow the lines from another song--I can only imagine the joy that she has right now. I can only imagine the peace that she has. I long for the day when I will see her again.

I love you Grandma!

Grandma Update

I spoke with my mom a few minutes ago and she gave me an update on my Grandma.

It doesn' t look too good. The cancer has spread and is confirmed now in the pancreas, liver, abdomen (pressing against her small intestine), and lungs. She also has a tumor on her elbow and hip. The tumor that is pressing against her small intestine is not allowing any food to pass from her stomach and the reason she has not kept anything down recently. She is having a procedure today to put a stint in her small intestine that will not collapse as the tumor continues to grow.

They have made the decision to stop all chemotherapy. The two chemos she has taken to this point were the best for treating pancreatic cancer (where hers started) and they have not done anything. They are talking about radiation for the tumors on her elbow and hip. Those are the only one causing her any pain. If they can shrink those tumors they are hopeful to get her off morphine and not need pain medication until the end.

Although the doctors are not giving any specific time line, they are also going ahead and setting Grandma up with hospice care. My sister (who has her nursing degree) has said that in her experience patients who are expected to live longer than six months do not receive hospice care.

Please continue to pray for my Grandma, me, and the rest of our family as we go through the next several months that God will help us endure whatever he allows to come our way.

Christmas Store

The thing I have heard over and over about this year’s Christmas Store from those who were there is that it was “the best Christmas Store we have ever had.” This is coming from church members, repeat volunteer workers, and community members. Officially the Christmas Store served over 100 adults who shopped for over 300 kids. That is over 300 children who will wake up Christmas morning with a gift under the tree to unwrap.

I need to take a minute and give out a special, “Thank You,” to all who made it possible for me to be away from the Christmas Store and be with my family. To Ann Rodgers (Wonder City Church member and Servant Leader) for running the Christmas Store. To Rodney Smithers, Phil and Barbara Clothier, and Sue Cash for coming down from Missouri Street to lead a hand. To Ryan and Emily Fowler for coming from Memphis Urban Ministry to lead a hand as well. To my wife Amy, who was unable to be with me in Indianapolis (although she wanted to be there), who took care a some last minute details and made sure that I was where I needed to be this past weekend.

I wish I had a story from someone from the Christmas Store about what it meant specifically to them, but I don’t. What I do have is a quote from Ryan Fowler (the Memphis Urban Ministry Administrator) who helped work the store. This is what he said.

Well, to me, the neatest part of the entire day wasn't necessarily all of the toys that were handed out. I found it even more special to see the Wonder City Church members who were there, some of whom could have easily been on the other side of the checkout counter, but instead were there serving their neighborhood and community by working at the store. The church members from Wonder City did an incredible job of running the store and making sure that everything went the way it needed to. And while Emily and I were happy to be there and to help out, there's just something extra special about neighbors helping out neighbors. That's why I appreciate Wonder City so much - it's a church that connects to the community that it is in, and that's something that all of our churches could do a better job of.

That is exactly what the Christmas Store is all about—connecting the church to the community. Serving those whom we are called to serve. Blooming where God has planted us. And isn’t that also what the Christmas season is all about—getting out of ourselves and giving. Jesus said, “It is more blessed to give than receive” (Acts 20:25). I don’t know that there has ever been a time in the nearly six years that I have been here that I have been prouder of Wonder City Church than I am over what they accomplished through this year’s Christmas Store.

Therefore the biggest, “thank you,” goes out to God. For loving us enough that he sent his son to earth. Born through a virgin. Whose “birthday” we celebrate in just few days. And for his continued work in and through Wonder City.

Merry Christmas!

Grandma, Grandpa, and New Memories

This past weekend I was able to be in Indianapolis with my family for Christmas. I enjoyed being there and making new memories. Some of my fondest memories growing up are being at Grandma and Grandpa’s—especially at Christmas. I have shared how my Grandma has cancer and how this may be here last Christmas (for more information see my previous post Grandma).

Grandma isn’t doing too well right now. Her cancer continues to grow and spread—now confirmed in her pancreas and liver and likely in her lungs and lymph nods. My mom shared with me that when she and my dad arrived on Wednesday that my Grandma “looked like death.” She was in pain and could not keep anything down. It was reported to me that Thursday she was doing some better. By the time I arrived on Friday, Grandma was up and about helping get ready for the evening dinner and gift exchange as much as she could.

However, Saturday was not a good day. She was back in bed and could not keep anything down again. She didn’t get out of bed until around dinner time. She came out into the living room and enjoyed a movie with the family who was still there. I left to return to Memphis on Sunday morning in time to be back for worship at Wonder City. Sunday night about midnight they took her to the hospital. Yesterday, they drained 4 liters of fluid off her abdomen.

It is amazing to me how the day that all the family was there, she felt well enough to be up and be with the family. Before we had the gift exchange Friday evening my aunt asked the family to share their most memorable Christmas gift. The gift I shared was our new home (although we moved in several months ago). However, as I have had time to reflect on this weekend, I believe of all the gifts that I have received or will receive this Christmas or any other, that gift from God will be the one that I will always remember. The fact that he allowed my Grandma to have her one good day over the course of the weekend on that specific day—the day that all the family was together and the day we celebrated Christmas as a family—is a gift that I will never forget.

I know that many of the people who read this blog are people of faith and prayer. Please add my Grandma—Emma Colglazier—to your prayer list. She is a special lady to me. I don’t want to lose her. Selfishly I want her here for many years to come. However, I don’t want her to suffer either. So pray for me also—that God will give me the strength to deal with whatever he has in his plans.

Blog Reading

Recently I have read several blog posts that need to be shared. The points made are too good not to be passed around. They were written by two men (Mike Cope and Larry James) that I have a huge amount of respect for (although I don't know either personally). In my opinion, these are two blogs that you (especially those in Churches of Christ) need to be reading on a regular basis.

Go to Mike Cope's Blog and read his posts titled Leroy, Richland Hills, and Instrumental Music and the one titled A Cappella Music.

Also, read Larry James' Urban Daily post titled Rick Warren and his critics.

Grandma

My Grandma is a very special lady to me. I love her dearly. Earlier this year she was diagnosed with cancer. My Grandparents live in Indianapolis, IN, so I don’t get to see them very often. However, with my Grandma’s cancer and not knowing how much time she has left, it has become very important for me spend as much time with them as possible. So, back in October, I went and spent a couple days with my Grandparents. I really enjoyed my time there. I was able to relax, get a little work done, and just be there with my Grandma and Grandpa. They know how much I like Indian food, so they took me to an Indian restaurant for lunch one day. We watched TV together and were just present with each other.

Due to holiday availability of the larger family, the date for the Christmas get together was changed over Thanksgiving from Christmas weekend to December 13-17. Amy and I had planned on being there. However, she doesn’t have any vacation days to use for the new dates and this was also the scheduled weekend as our major holiday outreach—the annual Christmas Store. When I heard these new dates, my heart immediately sank. Who knows if this will be my Grandma’s last Christmas—and I won’t be able to be there for it. I even spent some time crying (something which is rare for me!). My sister recently sent out a holiday questionnaire asking some of her family and friends some of their holiday traditions and favorite memories. Some of my favorite holiday and childhood memories are the ones spent with Grandma and Grandpa. I spent some time grieving the loss of making more memories this year.

As I have shared these events and feelings with those who are close to me, everyone has said how important it is for me to be in Indianapolis for the Christmas get together. I am trying not to live in the future too much, but rather live in the present. But it is hard not to think about the possibility that this may be the last Christmas with Grandma. Even my Grandpa admitted in a family email that their time may be coming soon. It is a reality that has to be faced. So right now I am trying to figure out how I can get to Indianapolis for the family gathering—one more chance to make special memories. I have talked with several individuals about the Christmas Store and covering for me. I am looking at flights from Memphis to Indianapolis on Friday and returning on Saturday evening or early enough on Sunday to still be able to preach at Wonder City. All the details haven’t been worked out yet, but it looks like I may make it after all. Should I make there, I want to be there and enjoy the family and make new memories without thinking the entire time, “This may be the last Christmas,” but I don’t know if I can or not. Either way, I imagine that this will be one of the most difficult holiday seasons that I have ever gone through.