Two, Two, One

I apologize for the long delay since last writing. However, I am in the middle of a major life transition and I had to make sure that certain people knew what was going on before writing anything here. This transition and the issues leading up to it have been the topics on my mind the past several months. I wasn’t sure that I could write anything without reflecting on these issues or the transition. Now all decisions have been made and all who need to be personally informed have been notified.

There were two dinners this past week that summed up the past several months. Both of these dinners had its own very different meaning. However, both pointed to the transition Amy and I are going through.

The first dinner was Thursday night. Amy and I invited the Wendel family from SouthPoint Church (the lead pastor’s family where we have been worshipping since the beginning of April) over for dinner. We had a great time. We sat around the kitchen table and talked well past 9pm. The kids played with the dog and watch cartoons on TV. I imagine that we could have talked several more hours had they not needed to go put kids in bed. Amy and I are excited about what God is doing through SouthPoint and the ways that he is already connecting us to that body through service and leadership.

The second dinner was Saturday night. All of the Memphis Urban Ministry staff had been invited over to one of my co-workers house’s for dinner. However, this dinner had a very different feel for Amy and me. Part of what was done that night was to honor Amy and me for our years of service with MUM (since 2001). We were given gifts and prayed over. I left that night knowing an era of my life was drawing to a close.

All of the issues that have led to this are too great to put into this post right now. I will summarize them all by saying the longer I stayed the more I felt life being sucked out of me. Although not diagnosed by a mental health professional, I felt that I was slipping into a slight depression. I saw how I was using food as a coping mechanism (I have put back on 45 lbs. of the 60 lbs. that I lost several years ago). The definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over and expecting different results. I was definitely practicing a form of insanity. I “woke up” and realized how unhappy I was and how little life I had. I knew that if I didn’t do something different things would just get worse.

I am not going to work for SouthPoint Church. That means that I am looking for a new job. I am now doing well with all of this. It has been a long time coming and I believe that it is for the best. Being completely honest, I probably should have made this move when I moved from Wonder City to the main MUM office in the spring of last year. However, fear of the unknown is a powerful motivator and hindsight is always 20/20. There is still some fear. I am still working for MUM, but a final day of July 31 has been set (unless I am able to find a new job before then). I have a couple of leads that I am working. Pastor Craig said yesterday that God loves surprises, but he often waits until it is a day late (according to our timing) so that we know it is him. I sure hope God does wait until after July 31 to provide a new job and source of income. However, one thing I do know is that he has always taken care of us in the past and he will do so in the future as well.

Two dinners, two different meanings, one major life transition. Praise God that he is in control.


On a different note – this is going to be my official last post to this blog. I set this up as a place to reflect on what God is doing in my life and ministry. Part of that was to keep financial supporters updated on what was going on in my ministry. Another part of it was for this to be like an open diary. I really don’t want or need that anymore. If I decided to continue blogging, I need to create something different. For me that means I need to start from scratch. I will check back here for about a week to read any comments you may want to leave.

So to use an old radio format, “This is Mack on Reflections Blog signing off…”

Straight Out of the Movies

Yesterday, there was a scene straight out of the movies in West Memphis. Many of you may have seen it on the national news. I saw it this morning on Fox News' Fox and Friends show (although I knew about it yesterday shortly after it happened). A car bomb exploded almost killing a doctor who is also the chairman of the Arkansas State Medical Board. The last I heard (at least that sounds plausible) is that someone planted the devise under or around the hood of the car and did something that lured him to the front of the car and then exploded the devise. It really was a scene straight out of a movie where someone was walking to his car only to have it explode.

I have several friends in the Marion and West Memphis area who know the him and his family. Last I heard he had lost his left eye and they were hoping to save the right one. I along with many in the area have been praying for the doctor and his family. I also pray they find the person who did this!

100!

I noticed about a week ago that my next post (now this post) is my 100th post! Getting here has been a journey of almost three years. Even as I sit here and write, I can't help but think of all that has transpired in my life over the last three years. Most of the major events have made there way to this blog and are available for anyone in the world to read. Many of the smaller events and routine living of life hasn't appeared here. Most of that is very intentional. I tend to be private person. As I have done a lot of soul searching and personal discovery over the past 5 plus years I have learned that most of my outgoing nature was an attempt to cover my low view of myself and have people like me (so that I could feel good about myself). Now, I live a much more congruent life. I enjoy going home after work during the week and relaxing by watching TV with Amy (and keeping the house straightened up). I love just hanging out with my handful of friends. I love watching football on the weekends. I love that Amy puts up with my love of sports (and football in particular)!

Life is a journey. And I am discovering that it about living as the person God created each of us to be. Sometimes (many times) our culture tells us somehting different. That who we are isn't good enough. That we have to be something or someone other than who God created us to be. That is not what God intended. I believe that is what God is telling us through the proverb found in Proverbs 22:6 (from The Message)

Point your kids in the right direction—
when they're old they won't be lost.

This verse isn't about instilling the right morals in kids and when they are old they won't leave those morals. Instead it is God's instruction to parents to help their children discover who God created them to be and help start them on that journey. When I am who God created me to be--I won't be held captive by culture. I won't stray from who God created me to be just to please someone or have someone like me. Perhaps the reason we have so many people in our society who experience a "mid-life crisis" is due to the fact that they were never pointed in the right direction. So they get to a point in their life when they hate themselves and their lives--because they are not being true to who God created them to be. Sadly many have never discovered who God wants them to be.

I don't know where God will lead me in the future on life's journey. Even though there is a pat of me that would love to know God's master plan for me, I think it is more fun not knowing. But one things I do know. I intend to continue to live more congruently with who God created me to be and his will for my life every day--one day at a time.

When I sat down to write this post earlier, I intended to write about a ministry event from this weekend. However, these ramblings are what flowed from my heart. I'll write about the ministry event later...(maybe!) ;)

Tutoring

Since leaving Wonder City last December I have not been as involved in direct ministry. Although I am still teaching and preaching, I am not doing these activities on a set regular basis. My ministry has been more through developing new relationships and helping out where needed.

Yesterday, I started attending “1 Up” as a tutor to elementary age kids. “1 Up” is Memphis Urban Ministry’s after-school tutoring program in the downtown community. This program was started earlier this school year. Although, I am needed, this will now become a regular part of my ministry with MUM post Wonder City.

I enjoyed yesterday. Although different from the after-school program we had at Wonder City, it was good to hang out with the kids and help them with their homework and subjects where they need to improve. Yesterday, I was helping Tameesha, a kindergartner, with matching and phonics. Her phonics homework involved looking at a picture, saying what it was, and writing the letter that made the final sound in the word (ex. one picture was of a fan and she needed to write the letter “n”). No matter what word I used to indicate the final, last, end sound of the word, Tameesha kept saying the beginning sound of the word. Eventually she got the hang of what she was supposed to be doing and finished her homework quickly.

So far “1 Up” is enjoying success. Yesterday the student brought their second report cards. All the students were able to improve at least one letter grade in most of their subjects. I don’t remember any student who had an “F” on their report card for this previous grading period. I believe this is due to the quality of volunteer tutors our Outreach Minister, Dorn, has put together and the one on one tutoring the students have been receiving two days a week. SAY YES! at Wonder City didn’t enjoy this level of success for a couple of reasons: 1) only one day a week and 2) 5 students to one mentor/tutor. I hope and pray that God will continue to allow us to see this level of success at “1 Up.”

New Neice

Yesterday, about this time my sister gave birth to a baby girl. Her name is Nevaeh Marie (born 8:58 eastern; Oct 22nd; 7 lbs 3 1/2 oz). Her first name is Heaven spelled backwards. To be honest, I have mixed emotions about this birth of this baby. On the one hand I am excited and happy for my sister. I love her and will love this addition to our family as well. I was constantly checking my phone for texts and phone calls for updates on the status of the birth. On the other hand, my sister is 18. I have seen the consequences of teenage pregnancy and witnessed cycles repeated over and over. I am concerned for my sister and Nevaeh. I don't believe any child is a mistake. And I do believe that good came come of this. I do believe that God can take this situation and do things far greater than I know to ask or can imagine. My prayer is just that. "Daddy God, take this new life and bring glory to your name through it."

To my sister, "Congratulations! I can't wait to see pictures and met Nevaeh face to face."

Chiropractor

For the first time in about 10 years I went to a chiropractor this morning. I was in so much back pain on Wednesday that I broke down and made an appointment. All of my back issues started when I was in jr. high and playing basketball at the YMCA. One practice, my team was practicing the 2 on 1 fast break. I was the player to put up the layup . When I did my teammate (playing the defense) undercut me to get in position for the rebound. I fell hard on my lower back. I saw a chiropractor from 1993 to 95 (went I left home for college). And I had a few additional adjustments when I was home from college on breaks. However, my back pain has never completely gone away. It is something that flares up from time to time and I have just dealt with. My new chiropractor took an x-ray this morning and my lower back still has the curve in spinal column that was there over 10 years ago. She adjusted my back and I left feeling much better. I go back Tuesday morning for another adjustment. This may seem odd, but I can't wait!

New Ministry Partner

Part of my job in my role with Memphis Urban Ministry is to cultivate relationship with existing area congregations and find ways that they can partner with MUM to serve the poor in Memphis. Ross Road Church is a church in southeast Memphis. Southeast Memphis is an area of town that over the last couple of years many of the poor have been moving. As the City of Memphis has closed appartment housing complexs and dispursed the residents across the city many have found a new "home" in the neighborhoods aroudn Ross Road Church. This church that used to be full of young professionals has been in decline over the past several years as the community around it has changed. However, those who remain have a heart to reach out to those who have moved into the community. They are located next door to an elementary school and have partnered with the school. They have also hired a new minister recently from Texas who has been involved in urban ministry work (in particular drug rehab work). This congregation has decided this year to partner with MUM to give away the fixings for Thanksgiving dinner (turkey included) through our Turkey Giveaway. After Thanksgiving, they will also partner with us to provide toys to the neighborhood children through the Christmas Store. We are excited about this new partnership. This will give MUM an inroad into that community and church home to point the poor to in southeast Memphis.

Halloween Costume Shopping

Amy and I had an interesting night last night. But let me back up to yesterday morning. Yesterday morning my neighbor won four tickets on a local radio station to our local corn maize for last night. She called and asked Amy and I if we want to go. We said, “yes.” So all day we were all looking forward to going last night and being out of the house in the evening. However, it rained for the first time in weeks here Tuesday and yesterday (Wednesday). So the corn maize was closed last night.

But none of us just wanted to do the normal be at home watching TV thing last night—especially after looking forward to being out all day. So we eventually decided to go shopping for Halloween costumes. We started out at Mr. Lincoln’s Costume Shop. This was pretty cool. It was a traditional costume rental place. This was the first time I had ever been in a place like this. Costumes hung on the walls with masks, face paint, fake blood, fake teeth, and all the other Halloween costume accessories. We left there and went looking for a place called Trick-R-Treat. When we eventually found it after much out of the way driving (by the way—we were in two vehicles with Amy and me following) it turned out to be nothing more than a fulfillment location for internet orders. So we left there and started back towards AR. But then we found another place that sold costumes for adults—Party City. So we doubled back and went to Party City. We had lots of fun at Party City, even though no one bought anything. Our neighbors each tried on a costume (his & hers) and we all had fun with the masks. We left Part City and started home for good around 8:30.

So why were we shopping for Halloween costumes. After all, Amy and I don’t have a reason to dress up—no kids, no Halloween party. I finally asked while we were at Party City when we would wear these. It turns out my neighbors have been invited to a costume party. The one costume party that Amy and I have been invited to in Memphis was lots of fun. It was a couple of years ago and I went as a judge. I hope they have a good time in a few weeks.

I don’t know if we will get to do the corn maize on another night (Wednesday night was the Radio Station night) or not, but it looked like lots of fun. I will post about the corn maize if we get to go.

Surprise

What a surprise I had a few minutes ago. I received a phone call from Ryan S.--an old college friend and best man at my wedding. Ryan and I have had minimal correspondence since we both graduated with our bachelor's degrees in 1999. We spent about 10 minutes on the phone catching up and hearing about others we both have kept in communication with from our days at Harding University. We exchanged phone numbers and emails. Hopefully it won't be another 9 years before we talk again!

Christian?

I have been reading a book recently titled The Big Idea by Dave Ferguson. The first chapter of his book is titled "No More Christians." He believes that true Jesus followers should no longer call themselves "Christian" and should stop encouraging others to become a Christian. Don't misunderstand--he is all for evangelism. He states that some 85% of Americans (or 247 million people) call themselves Christian. Dave then points to research that shows there is no differnece in the attitudes or actions of Christians and non-Christians. He asks, "If the contemporary concept of a Christian is of someone who is no differnt than the rest of the world, is Christian really the word you want to use to describe your willingness to sacrifice everything you have to see God's dream fulfilled?" He answers, "No way." He concludes the chapter by saying that Christianity "has been reduced to the expectation of niceness." He no longer calls himself a Christian, but a Christ follower--a disciple. One last quote, "I am a Christ follower. I follow Jesus step by step as his Spirit moves me in his community called the church."

I did a little research. The term "Christian" only appears in the NT three times. Compare that to "disciple" that appears close to three hundred times. I grew up in a Christian hertitage that prided itself on "calling Bible things by Bible names." Although I don't get into that, I do want people to understand that I am serious in my faith walk. In our society where it is acceptable to call oneself a Christian and not go to church but a couple times of year or even every Sunday but not be involved with the life of the church or growing more into the image of Christ--do I want to call myself by the term that is synomous with that lifestyle? So I have been going back and forth in my mind about no longer calling myself a Christian. I thought about adopting the either the term "Christ follower" (as Dave Ferguson uses) or "Disciple" to describe my relationship to Jesus. To be honest, I haven't made up my mind yet.

These are the questions I have been pondering--Should Christians who are serious about their faith walk with Jesus adopt another label such as "Disciple" or "Christ follower?" Should we continue to use the label of "Christian" but work to redefine what it means it our society? Is that even possible? Has the term "Christian" been so hi-jacked that the church is past the point of being able to redefine it back to what it originally meant in the NT? Are there/What are the advantages and disadvantages to using a new term or continuing to use the term Christian?

Ten

Ten years today! Today my wife and I are celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary. As I have looked back over the past ten years today we have been through a lot--some stressful and tough but most of it good. We have lived five different places in our marriage. However, for the past seven plus years we have been in the Memphis metro area. Life right now is good. We both have good jobs. We love being in our house. We love our dog. We love our friends.

Although we could not afford to go somewhere special this weekend later this fall we will return to the site of our honeymoon for a marriage retreat. So, we both took the day off from work and have enjoyed the day together.

This morning we went to the Memphis Zoo. Amy loves the zoo. The Memphis Zoo is working on improving the quality of the living spaces for the animals. Over the past several years the zoo has added a China exhibit including pandas and the Northwest Passage for bears, bald eagles, seals, etc. Over the next two years two more new major exhibit areas will be opened. We enjoyed looking at the animals, but the temperature quickly rose to almost 100 degrees. So we stayed for a few hours and left around 1:30. We have been lazy around the house this afternoon recouping the energy the sun took from us at the zoo. We are now getting ready to go to dinner at Texas de Brazil.

All in all I am very thankful for my life and my wife. I don't know that there is another woman out there who would love me like she does. Ten years ago at our wedding I played Billy Dean's "If There Hadn't Been You" to her. Those words are even more true now. There is so much that I have done and I am where I am today because of her. I pray that God will give us many more years together.

Hair

For several months now Amy and I have been having a discussion about my hair. I have very thick coarse curly hair. When I have gone to soemone to get it cut they often refer to just how thick it is. If I were to let my hair grow it would turn nice tight curly locks. However, I hate my curly hair (I know everyone hates their hair and wishes for soemthing different). For that reason, I have always kept my hair very short--often no longer on top than the thinkness of a persons finger. Amy on the other hand likes my long curly hair.

For a long time I had a hair cut similar to Russell Crowe in the movie Gladiator. In fact, one person even gave me a nickname of "Spaniard" because my hair cut resembled that one so closely. For several years now Amy has been the person to cut my hair. Which is nice for a couple of reasons--its free and no appointment is needed. But on the other hand we are very busy and sometimes my hair will go 3-4 weeks from the point it needs cut until it gets cut.

I have been in the mood for something different and something I can do myself. Understand I wouldn't mind going completely bald. But Amy says, "bald ain't beautiful" unless it is natural. When I mean bald, I mean I would go cream and ravor all the way down to nothing.

So about five to six weeks ago I took out the clippers, put on the #2 guard, and shaved my head down. Amy was furious. She did not like it at all. It was too short. She could see my scalp through my head. It is not attractive to her. I let it grow for a couple of weeks then did it again. This time she didn't say anything. Not much came off so she might not have noticed. Then about a week-and-a-half ago I put the #1 guard on the clippers and went over it. Again she was furious. The same comments as before. To me, it is my hair; I'm the one that has to fix it and wear it. But to Amy she is the one that has to look at it and she would like my hair to be soemthing that is attractive to her.

I love my hair. It is short and cool in the southern summer heat (99 today and 100 tomorrow in the Memphis area). I have received comments from both sides--some like it and others don't. Here are some pictures of me and my hair as it looks today (I took these on my cell phone camera so they are not the best pictures). I would love to hear what you think. And I promise not to mention what you say when Amy and I next continue our conversation about my hair.

New Job & Vision Dinner

I haven't talked a lot on my blog about my (relatively) new job. I am now the Development Director for Memphis Urban Ministry (MUM). This is the same organization that I was very closely connected to for my seven years at Wonder City. MUM is one of the groups that helped start Wonder City and that still blesses the ministry at Wonder City. My role in Development here involves two primary tasks--fundraising and public relations. Of course, Amy and I are still involved in ministry. We have started attending worship at Raleigh Community CoC--another of the urban churches here in the Memphis area. We are both still adjusting and getting to know the people at Raleigh.

One of the Development pieces that was already being planned when I started this job was our annual (although we have missed a couple years recently) Vision Dinner. This year marks a big step in process for our Vision Dinner. For the first time all the planning is being done by a volunteer planning committee. I am the liason between them and the rest of the MUM staff. This year the MUM staff will not have to be the volunteer setup and clean up staff. Also this year the dinner is being moved out of one of our sponsoring church's gym/family life center. This year's dinner will be at Opera Memphis. I would love for as many of my blog readers as possible to come join us on Saturday, September 6th from 6-8 pm.

Worship

I love worship. In fact, if there is any part of ministry that is my favorite it is worship. If you really want to hear me go on and on about a subject, just start talking about worship. I love planning worship. I love a well exicuted worship service that is tight and truly God-focused. I love worshipping. I love worship so much that this past Tuesday night I attended a worship service via live feed online.

I have come to really enjoy worship music. All I listen to now is Christian radio. If I am in my car, I am listening to K-Love (the national network of Christian radio stations that plays "top-40" in the lite rock/pop style of Christian music). If I am in my office or at home I am probably listening to Air1 online (the sister station to K-Love but plays more of the alternative style of Christian music) since we don't have a local station.

One of the songs that was sung this past Tuesday night was Hillsong United's "Mighty to Save." I have heard the song before this week, but it has really connected with me this week. Since Tuesday I have not been able to get enough of this song or get it out of my head. In fact, as I have typed this post I am now listening to this song for the third time!

Here is a video of the band leading the song in worship.


BTW--now listening for the 4th time!

Blog Potatoe

I admit to being a blog potatoe. Part of that is the transitions my life has been going through and the things that I have been thinking about--most of which are not ready for this forum. Another part of it is that I haven't really believed that I have had anything worth writing about. I look at my sister's blog and most of it is about her 3 kids and the things they are doing. When kids are involved there is definately a lot of stuff to write about. However, when all I do is get up, go to work, come home to work and relax, go to bed, and do it all over again there isn't much there to write about (at least I think).

I have been on my job for 3 months now. Development and PR for a religious non-profit (not a 501(c)3 but a ministry of a church) is somewhat different from what I used to do but still very similiar. I have discovered that I am very good at project manangement. That is how I approached my last job as a minister (and why I needed to get out of full-time ministry) and it is how I am approaching this job. This job is much more about projects and deadlines--fundraisers, newsletters, events, etc. I am enjoying it.

For now I am signing off. I will do my best not to go so long between blog posts. God Bless

Grandmother

Mom called last Monday (March 31) and told me that Grandmother (my Dad's mom) had passed. Those who read my blog regularly may remember that it was just a little more than a year ago that I also lost my Grandma (my Mom's mom). This passing was not nearly as hard on me as my Grandma was. I was never all that close to my Grandmother and I remember fewer visits to see her than to my Grandma (and Grandpa).

For the past couple of years she had been suffering from the effects of dementia. It has been sometime now since she remembered who I was. Her oldest son (and my uncle) said at her funeral on Friday that all she remembered of him was that "here is a good friend." This passing has been the toughest on my Dad. Dad is the youngest of Grandmother's four kids. Dad is also the one who has cared for her as she has slipped further and further away. Grandmother lived in an assisted living facility near my parents in GA, and it was Dad who took her to see her doctor, picked her up for church and family events, and regularly visited her. Because of my Dad's close interaction with her she still knew Dad. Please don't miss understand me. I will miss my Grandmother. She was a strong woman. I don't believe I fully appreciated her until after she passed last week. My uncle wrote these following words that helped me understand and appreciate my Grandmother even more. It was an email he sent out that with a simple title "We Lost Mom Today." (I know it is long, but I believe you will be blessed by reading it.)

---From my Uncle Ron (Dad's oldest brother)---

We received a call from our daughter early this morning to inform us that my mother passed away Monday night (Tuesday morning here [they serve as missionaries in China]).

Mom suffered a stroke about eight years ago and has had increasing struggles ever since. She was a strong woman who worked hard all her life to take care of herself and us. She had many heartbreaking experiences in life, but never complained about them much. Mostly she just bore the pain and worked to do the best she could with the situations she faced. I had been a grown man for several years before I really began to realize what all she had endured and to appreciate the grace with which she bore her hardships. She lived in faith and faithful quietness, enjoying the happy times and struggling through the painful ones.

I cannot imagine the agony a mother of four would experience when she became convinced that she could not provide for her children by herself. In the days when few social services were available to single mothers and women's work paid much less than the men's, few options were open to her. She could have married again after my father abandoned her and his children. Maybe there was not the hope or trust necessary to believe that another husband would be anymore helpful than the last. But the grueling work in the cotton mills day after day, and the incessant needs of four little ones, took its toll. Mom faced a future with no good options on the horizon. Others may criticize her choice. Likely they have never felt her fear for children she loved or for her own sanity. She arranged for us to live at Childhaven, a children's home in north Alabama, just two hours away. She moved closer so that we could visit often. Lee Brock, the superintendent's wife we have always called "Mother Lee," pointed out to me a few years ago what I had never realized: Of all the dozens of children that had lived there, no other parent ever came regularly to visit with their children. Mom came ever other weekend. My father came once during my twelve years. Some may think placing us at Childhaven was an act of self-indulgence. I think it was an act of self-sacrifice. She was not seeking deliverance for herself but salvation for her children. And she paid an awful price for it. But it worked. All of her children are Christians and have established stable, happy homes. The cycle has been broken. In that Mom found joy and some peace from the agony of being separated from us so much for all those years. As adults none of us has ever harbored any resentment toward her for the decision she made. We have always loved her and held her in great respect.

Having been blessed so much myself with a loving and supportive partner, I always longed for Mom to have had the same. But she experienced little of that. First my father, and later my stepfather, both of whom could be very pleasant fellows at times, took much more than than they gave to Mom. She never expressed regret, much less anger toward either of them, and wanted to appear that it did not hurt or sadden her. But it has always been painful for me to think of the stress she bore and the love she was denied in both marriages. The strength of her character and self-discipline kept her on a steady, non-complaining, responsible course. But I fear it was far more lonesome than you would ever get her to admit.

Before her stroke, when she had retired and moved back to the farm where she grew up. She seemed to find a contentment that had often alluded her before. She loved the country around Deason, a small crossroads farming community in middle Tennessee. Many of the people who had been young adults when she was a youngster were still living, though now long time senior citizens. But they were her kind of people and this was home as no place else had ever been. So when she the stroke made it hard, even dangerous, for her to live alone in the country, it was still the only place she wanted to be. These were the people she understood. They were the people with whom she was safe and loved. Only with the greatest pain and sadness did she finally decide she could not remain there alone. But from the first day she left the farm to live in the comfort and supportive environment of "assisted living" she never stopped saying she "just wanted to go home."

Now she has gone home where all the pain and struggle are forever behind her. At last she is in the presence of no one who will take more from her than they give. I look forward to being with her again and, as never before, seeing her completely happy.

Evelyn and I leave in a few hours to return join our family in the US for a few days of mourning and celebration. Funeral plans are still pending.

Where does the time go?

Wow! February 3rd. One twelth of 2008 is gone. Where does the time go? It is amazing how quickly time flies even when one is not working full-time. After finishing my ministry at Wonder City at the end of the year, I have taken some time off from ministry for some much needed refreshment and renewal. One of the blessings and curses of this past month was being able to worship wherever we choose on Sunday. We have visited various churches and experienced some different styles of worship. It was a blessing to be able to worship and not have any responsibility for what is happening-just to be there and be able to worship. As someone who is the process of planting a church recently wrote it is the difference of attending worship verses doing worship. The down side of it was that Amy and I were basically visitors in a number of churches over the past month. There was no connection with those we were worshiping with. We were not really a part of that particular body. There was a vertical connection, but no horizontal connection. I have learned the value in being connected to a body of believers.

Being on this time of renewal and refreshment is not to say that I have been sitting at home doing nothing. (Despite what Amy may think-I only took one nap this past week.) I have been doing some work around the house. I have also already "started" my new job as Director of Development for Memphis Urban Ministry. Although I have not officially started the job, I am working 2-3 days a week from home; attending meetings, scheduling appointments, and doing whatever else I need to get done. This week I will be geting a mailing out, working on a document for the MUM staff meeting (Tuesday), and attending a couple of meetings. This coming Sunday Amy and I will reengage our leadership roles in the urban churches in Memphis-churches where we have both vertical and horizontal connections.

On a lighter note, the SuperBowl is tonight. New York vs. New England. I am going to enjoy the game, and in the first time in a couple of years not care who wins or loses. I would love to see history made and the Patriots go 19-0 humbling the '72 Dolphins. Even as I have been sitting here watching the pre-game this afternoon Fox has interviewed several members from the '72 Miami team and they have said they are actively looking for someone to beat the Patriots. On the other had, I would love to see Eli and the Giants win. I would love to see the underdog pull it out. My prediction is that New England will win by 10-14 points. Kickoff is now less than 30 minutes away, so I guess the outcome will be final in about 4 hours or so. For Amy, she is just glad football will be over!

Christmas Store

We had our annual Christmas Store this past Saturday. The Christmas Store is an event where people from our community can come and purchase toys and gifts for their children at 25% of the regular cost. We receive our toys and gifts from our partnership with Memphis Urban Ministry. They receive them from churches and individuals across the Memphis area who care about the poor and want to ensure they have a blessed Christmas as well. We had 63 individuals come through this year and purchased gifts for 258 children. This outreach allows these families to purchase toys for their own kids at affordable prices without forcing them to accept another handout that strips them of their dignity. Here are some pictures from this past Saturday.

Growth

The next couple of weeks I will spend some time reflecting out loud about my time at Wonder City. It is hard to believe that I only have two more weeks left at Wonder City after being here seven years. One of the things I that I have noticed the most over that time is the growth that has taken place at Wonder City. Seven years ago (back when I was a lowly apprentice) when Chris (the minister who founded Wonder City and whom I originally worked under) would bring up an issue with the church members to discuss they would usually automatically defer to whatever Chris thought. They had a hard time understanding and grasping that this was their church and they had ownership in the church. They had a right and a duty to help make decisions and shape the future and direction of the church. Now we have Servant Leaders. Spiritual ladies who help make decisions that affect the church. Even when an issue is taken to all the adults they don’t have a problem any more telling me what they think (without deferring to my judgment). An example is a couple months ago I had ordered some curriculum for the Wednesday adult class. After going through the first book, I had several adults let me know they didn’t like it and they thought it was under where they were. So I returned the remaining books and we started something different. This past Wednesday they let me know they like what we are now studying.

You may be reading this and not see anything significant about it. However, this is a huge step for the poor and depressed. They are used to having their lives acted upon and being told what to do. The government tells them where they can and cannot live, how much food stamp money they will receive, and the list goes on. As a result they lose any sense of ownership (even over their own lives). So when someone comes along and gives them a choice and sincerely wants their input, they don’t know what to do with that. Therefore they will usually defer to the one asking the question. Consequently learning the ability to regain ownership and no longer be a victim in one area (such as church) means they have learned a skill they can transfer into the other areas of their lives (schooling, housing, etc.). This is also a key to breaking the cycles of poverty. Adults who take responsibility and ownership of their lives can pass that trait and ability on to their children.

Wonder City has undergone tremendous growth over the past several years. This is just one example. There is not enough time or space to discuss them all.

C3 Live!

Some friends of mine have started a Christian band and this past Saturday night they had their first concert. It Although it really wasn't a concert. However, they are not a worship band either. But it was worship; complete with worship videos and Christian messages (through the videos and songs). It is hard to describe what it was--and is. C3 is not the name of the band, but of the event. It stands for Christian Community Cafe. They set the place up like a coffee house and even had free coffee and cookies for everyone.

The guys who are in the group are from across various denominational lines. For their first show(and only six practices) it was great! For now they are planning on playing every first Saturday of the month. They are hoping to add more in the future.

Update on Jeremy

Quick Summary: Jeremy Smith was transferred from the MED to a rehab facility in Truman, AR last week. However, he developed an infection in his feeding tube and was taken to the hospital in Jonesboro, AR. At this time he is being quarantined.

More Info: Jeremy has made some great improvements-including sitting up (ability to stay awake for extended periods) and talking. All glory is to God. I was with the family when the doctors told Linda (his mom) he would not survive and was brain dead. Although Jeremy has an infection (which they believe he contracted while at the MED) and is currently quarantined , they do not believe it is life-threatening. Because the infection is connected to his feeding tube, Jeremy has not be feed for three days. They don't know if the infection is just around the stomach or if it is in the stomach as well. Jeremy has still not started to eat anything by mouth again yet. All food is being given through the feeding tube. Please continue to pray for Jeremy and his family.

More Football Reflections

I was shocked this past weekend when both WV and Mizzuo lost throwing the BCS into complete disarray (just one more reason why a playoff of some kind is needed). I expected OK to beat Mizzuo, but I did not expect WV to lose to Pitt! What a crazy college football season. I am glad to see that an SEC team is playing for the National Championship. Go Tigers!

Additionally, I did not expect (but very glad to see) Alabama get a bowl game. With so many SEC teams bowl eligible, I expected the Tide to get left out with a 6-6 record. I thought we would need at least a 7-5 record to go bowling. I will be watching on Dec 30th as Bama plays Colorado in the Independence Bowl. Roll Tide!

SEC Football Reflections

Well, Bama did lose this past weekend. Oh well! I can't say that I am completely surprised considering the way the team has been playing recently.

On the other hand there were two things that have completely surprised me in the SEC recently. First, Arkansas beat LSU! I would have never predicted that. I thought for sure that LSU was going to come out focused and take care of business knowing that losing would end their national championship hopes. Let me say for the record that I hate the overtime system in college football. It may work well for other conferences and teams in the NCAA, but not the SEC. Every season there multiple games that go 3+ overtime periods in SEC play (both games LSU has lost this year were 3+ overtime loses). The SEC teams beat each other up and are just too good. Giving teams the ball on the 25 yard line practically guarantees a score each possession. I don't know that they need to play a whole overtime period equal to a regular quarter of play, but I do believe some kind of timed overtime period that is fully played (no sudden death) is what is needed. Maybe something in the eight to ten minute range with fourth quarter rules applying. Each team could receive 2 timeouts. If the game is still tied at the end of the overtime period, then allow the game to end in a tie. Ties could be factored into the BCS and would definately make the current system even more interesting (although I am also for a playoff system-but that is another post for another time).

Second, living in Arkansas I have constantly heard the dissatisfaction with coach Nutt and the desire of the fans to have a new head coach. There were some that doubted the U of AR would let him go since he just signed an extension (before this season if I remember correctly). Also, all he has done is win at the U of AR. He has not been a bad coach with a losing record. So, I was surprised when he resigned from the Razorbacks and headed to Oxford, MS to be the new head coach at Ole Miss. People around here are glad he is gone. I will be very interested next season when the AR-Ole Miss game comes up on the schedule. That rivalry will now be more intensive than ever.

Cool New Tool & Bama

I like this new feature on blogger where I can put a poll out there and get everyone's feedback. I have decided my first poll will be a football poll. I am a big Alabama fan! I can't believe we lost to LA-Monroe this weekend. However, after two straight loses, redemption is coming this weekend in the form of Auburn--our arch enemy. The Tide will be hungry and looking to show everyone that we are deserving of a bowl. Tell me what you think and vote--will Bama beat Auburn this weekend?

The Right Time

Ecclesiastes 3:1-14 talks about how there is a time and a season for every activity on earth. It was the summer of 2000 when I was attending Harding Graduate School that I took the Urban Ministry class and was first introduced to Memphis Urban Ministry. That began the process for me (and Amy) to move from the boot heel of Missouri (where I was a pulpit minister) to come to the Memphis area and work at Wonder City. Amy and I moved here January 6, 2001 and began working at Wonder City on February 1, 2001. Although things were financially difficult for us for a while that was the right time for us. The past six plus years have been very rewarding for us and we would not give up this experience for anything.

However, now it is time for me to move on from Wonder City. This past September the elders at Missouri Street asked me to look at whether I was the right person to lead Wonder City long term considering it would only be a one person ministry for a while. After Amy and I both retook the Uniquely You personality profiles, had a couple of career consulting sessions and met with several other individuals along with much prayer, it was obvious that my gifts and personality would be best used by God in another role. Because of our love for Wonder City (and Missouri Street) this decision was not made lightly and was very difficult.

During this time I was also presented with the opportunity to become the Director of Development for Memphis Urban Ministry This new job will allow me to work more out my spiritual gifts than where I am currently as the minister of Wonder City. This new job will also allow me to continue to work for the future success of Wonder City (along with all the other urban churches) again by focusing my time and energy on those areas where God has gifted me. At this time there are still a few final steps that need to be taken to fully secure this new position, however, I fully believe this new position is God’s will.

The elders and I are still working towards determining an actual last day—probably at the end of the year. The work at Wonder City is God’s work (Eccles. 3:14). It was not my ministry. It is God’s ministry and I fully believe that he will continue to what he has been doing to reach those to whom Wonder City appeals and reaches out to. The elders have also reassured me and the Wonder City members that they are still very much behind the ministry at Wonder City and will work to find a new minister for Wonder City.

For those who financially support me in my work at Wonder City I will be contacting you within the next couple of weeks to talk with you more fully as your continued support will be a key to my success in my new role. To everyone I covet your prayers both for Amy and I and Wonder City during this time of transition. God Bless.

More on Jeremy

The latest news from Linda (Jeremy’s mom) is that he is slowly improving. This past Sunday they medical staff had Jeremy up and in a chair for a couple of hours. That was the most he could tolerate before they had to move him back to his bed. They still have him somewhat sedated, but not as much as before. They are hopeful that Jeremy can be moved to a room where they will be able to visit him at any time (verses designated times only) soon.

Sorry for the delay with the news. I have been sick the past couple of days with a sinus infection. I am better today after going to the doctor yesterday.

Highs and Lows

This past Sunday, Wonder City experience the high of a baptism. A 17-year-old young man who goes by A.V. was baptized. This baptism has been a long time coming. This young man has attended Wonder City for several years with his family. He has struggled with the idea of having to get his life together before giving his life to God. That is one of the biggest reasons I hear people give in the neighborhood for not becoming a Christian--having to wait to become a Christian until they take care of their sins. They have a hard time grasping that is what Jesus does when we give our lives to him. Finally a few weeks ago (just before Jeremy was shot) A.V. called me and told me he wanted to be baptized. Which we did this past Sunday.

However, this high was followed by a low on Monday evening when this same young man was arrested for shoplifting. His mom dropped him off at the grocery store to get some food and the next thing she knows he is being escorted out in handcuffs by a police man. According to A.V. the reason he was shoplifting was to get out of the gang which he belonged and this was what they required to get "jumped out." He spent Monday night in jail and had a court appearance on Wednesday morning.

Life is often messy in urban environments where the desire to do the right thing and peer pressure to do otherwise is often much stronger than anything I have ever personally experienced. I don't know what exactly is ahead of this young man as he deals with his legal issues, but I hope that he learns from this experience. I also hope that he is telling the truth and he was trying to get out of the gang since he had given his life to Jesus.

More on Jeremy

I have not heard any news in the past couple of days. I am assuming that everything is about the same. The one new piece of information I have is that when the doctors did the surgery to remove his left eye they did not have to remove the whole eye. They were able to leave the part of the eye that allows movement. Therefore, should he survive and is fitted with a glass eye, it will be able to move and look more natural. I will continue to post new information as it becomes available.

News on Jeremy

I apologize for it being a couple of days since I have updated the information on Jeremy.

On Friday, Jeremy had surgery to remove a piece of his skull. The pressure in his head had started to climb again so they needed to make more room for his brain to be able to swell and still allow the pressure in his head to remain lower. It was determined in that surgery on Friday that Jeremy was shot in the left eye as opposed to his mouth as originally thought. There was no damage to the eye lid itself indicating that the eye was open when he was shot. Reasoning that most people close their eyes if they are going to shot oneself seems to indicate that Jeremy was shot by someone else instead of it being a self inflicted gunshot wound. Jeremy was moved to the Neurological Unit where he will get even more and specialized attention than being in the Trauma Critical Care Unit where he was at.

Over the weekend the two major issues continued to be pressure inside his head and his temperature. Since being shot and entering the hospital both of these have fluctuated—sometimes wildly. Over the weekend his temperature was as high as 104 degrees and on Monday was at 102.

Today Jeremy was supposed to have another surgery to remove his left eye. The damage was too great to have any hope of saving his eye. As of this posting I have not heard any news today on his condition or how the surgery went.

The doctors have not changed his odds of survival—they are still 50/50. It is still a mater or time and prayer. They are doing all they can for him, but if he survives it will be a long slow road that he travels. Thank you for your continued prayers for Jeremy and his family. I know they appreciate them.

Update on Jeremy

Jeremy had a couple of procedures yesterday. First, they moved his tracheotomy tube from his mouth to his throat. They are hopeful he won’t fight the tube as much. This will also allow them to see the damage to the inside of his mouth and try to start feeding him. Second, he was supposed to have a dye injected into his brain to see where and how much damage had been done. At this point I have not heard how either of these procedures went or any results.

The picture is of Jeremy this past June at Uplift.

Bring a Friend Sunday

Yesterday was our Bring a Friend Sunday. For several weeks I had been encouraging our church to pray for yesterday by running a cartoon of another church's misfurtune on their friend day.

(caption reads, "for all you visiting, let me reassure you that the overhead usually works, the lady who water the plants is just on vacation, and the lapel mike is never ordinarily misplaced...")

Well, we had that type of Sunday. Our volunteer teachers for our 3-5 year old class didn't show up. I had several audio-visual things planned-none of it worked. The worship leader changed a couple of songs mid-service with no words for the new songs. In many ways yesterday was not the day I was hoping and praying for. Amy says that God was laughing in my face for putting the cartoon in our bulletin.

However, at the same time when things don't go the way I planned it is for a reason. God is usually demonstrating that he can take something that looks like a train wreck and make something good out of it. We had two men at church yesterday who I don't know have ever been there. One of those men is the husband of one of our Servant Leaders-Ann. In fact, she had not invited him to come with her yesterday. However, she was completely shocked when he woke up yesterday and asked her what he needed to wear to church. Yesterday afternoon when Amy and I were at the hospital visiting Jeremy he was also there and he told me "good sermon." In spite of the train wreck that was yesterday's worship service, God opened his heart received the message from yesterday's worship.

Update on Jeremy

God works a miracle. Jeremy made it through the night Thursday night and Friday made some dramatic improvements. Normal brain pressure is between 5 & 15. When Jeremy entered the hospital on Thursday his pressure was at 65. By Thursday night when I left it was down to 40. Friday the pressure continued to fall all the way back down to within normal range (where it continues to hold between 13 &15). Friday afternoon Jeremy started responding by moving his right eye (his left eye is severely damaged and will probably lose sight in it if he survives) and left side of his body. At 10:30 Friday night I received a phone call that Jeremy had woken up. The doctors put him on sedation meds to keep him calm and from exerting a lot of energy. They have now improved his odds of survival to 50/50.

Many prayers are still needed. There is still a long road ahead and it is still a wait and see situation.

At this time there is still no offical news on exactly what happened.

Young Black Men & Violence

This week I intended to write about the Fall Retreat that 3 of our youth attended with our supporting church. It was a great weekend with over 150 youth attending. To read what the youth minister from Missouri Street wrote on his blog, click here.

However, an event occurred yesterday that preempted the other post. One of our 18 year old young men (Jeremy) was shot yesterday. At this point in the investigation the police do not know if the gunshot was self-inflicted or someone else shot him. He and his family are not doing well. The bullet from a “small caliber revolver” entered through the mouth and bounced around inside his brain where it remains. Although he still has too much function to be declared legally brain dead there is nothing more the doctors can do for him. According to the doctors “it is just a matter of time.”

Whether this was self-inflicted or not this event is just a grave reminder of violence in the lives of young black men. A couple years ago some young men from the neighborhood were playing Russian Roulette and a young man picked up the gun, spun the barrel and said, “What the *#@!, I have nothing to live for.” He then pulled the trigger and killed himself. Although we don’t know yet exactly what happened in Jeremy’s case, how sad and disturbing it is for a young man to play Russian Roulette because they don’t believe they have anything worth living for. When one has no hope of an education or a job or a decent standard of living, it can appear as though there is nothing to live for. Even if one wouldn’t be attempting suicide any other way, just sitting around and playing such a dangerous game with such a thought running through one’s mind blows me away.

Jeremy though did have something to live for. He had moved out of his momma’s house earlier in the year—a young man wanting his independence. However, just three days before this happened he had returned home. He had spoken to his mom about going down to the community college and getting his GED. He rode to and from church Wednesday night with me on the church van. At no time did he appear to be someone who was contemplating suicide. If this was a self-inflicted g.s.w. I have no idea what he could have been thinking—nor does any of his family.

On the other hand if he was shot by someone else, Jeremy has become just another statistic of black on black violence. One more scenario of a black man attempting (at this point) to kill another black man. What happened or what an argument could have been about is still unknown. Jeremy and another young man were alone in the back of a house where this took place. However, what is known is that we have become a culture that is desensitized to violence. Guns are too easy to get a hold of. It is time for the violence and the killing to stop!

Let me be perfectly clear, at this point it is still unclear exactly how Jeremy was shot. The police have not said one way or the other. However, I couldn’t help thinking about both scenarios and reflect about how many of our young black men in our society are “fated” to such a premature and violent death.

Busy and Exciting Times

Wednesday I wrote that there are some exciting things awaiting me when I get back to Memphis. Here is a quick summary of some of those exciting things.

• Last Sunday we had over 60 in attendance. Although I was out of town this past Wednesday night (here at CCDA) I heard there were quite a few there then as well. I know that it has been at least a couple of months since we have had 60 on a Sunday morning.
• Next weekend we will probably have a few teens who attend the Camp Tahkodah Retreat with our supporting church. This has always been a great time for our teenagers. Each year I have been blessed at Tahkodah to have deep and meaningful conversations with some of teens about their lives and spiritual matters. Two years ago I even had the privilege of baptizing one of them at Tahkodah.
• Next Sunday, October 21st, those who are at Wonder City will celebrate our 8th Anniversary. Eight years ago on the third Sunday in October Wonder City held its first Sunday worship service. (Of course the work began earlier in 1999 with a block party that spring that lead to a children’s church and a group that started meeting for a prayer and Bible Study on Wednesday nights.) Amy & I weren’t around on that first Sunday. We came in January, 2001. Although we are not planning any special celebration it is a major accomplishment to celebrate 8 years! It has also been a very interesting and fun ride for Amy and I over the past 6+ years.
• The following weekend on Sunday, October 28th, we will have our first annual Bring a Friend Sunday. I am very excited about this opportunity for several reasons. First, this was not my idea. Nor, was it an idea of anyone from here at our supporting church. This was an idea of one of Wonder City’s church members that other church members bought into. Second, since our members have taken ownership with this idea I am excited to see how many visitors we have that Sunday. I am expecting several people who have never been to Wonder City to be there that Sunday. I am so pumped about this weekend that I have already started planning the worship service and my sermon for that Sunday.
• The first full week in November we will have our annual Fall & Winter Clothing Giveaway. Although this is not my favorite event, I know that there are those in our community who need the clothes that we provide. I am also excited about trying to work with our supporting church and Wonder City on how we can turn this paternalistic event into one that is more of a partnership between our two churches to serve our community.
• After the clothing giveaway we will make our turn into the holiday activities—the Turkey Giveaway and Christmas Store. Countless families and children have been blessed through these events that have brightened the holiday season that otherwise would have been much less joyful.

All of this means that it is a very busy time for us at Wonder City in addition to the weekly ministry that takes place. Please keep us in constant prayer as we seek to fulfill the Biblical mandate to bring God and people together.

Good Food

I have to give props to a good friend of mine. Four years ago at the CCDA conference (2003) Matt taught me how to eat out when you travel to a city you are not familiar with. The key is to ask the hotel staff where you are staying where they (and the other locals) like to eat. A good place to start is with the concierge desk. From them you can pick up a map of the area (sometimes with the local restaurants already marked). That is exactly what I did yesterday when I got into St. Louis for the CCDA conference. The concierge told me that St. Louis is known for its Italian. That was a surprise to me. However, she told me about an Italian place call Charlie Gitto's about 2 blocks from the hotel. First, it wasn't listed on the map or dinning guide that I picked up from her. Second, it didn't look like a type of restaurant I would normally enter without a recommendation. I usually like the places that look professional. Third, it was very good Italian. So Matt, "Thank you!"

At CCDA Conference & Steve Harvey Video

I am in St. Louis for the CCDA conference. This is my fifth year in a row to attend this conference. It is always a great time to get away and hear from others doing urban ministry. The worship tonight was some of the best in the five years I have attended the conference. The speaker tonight was from the Dominican Republic and has a great message about the way things are done in the Kingdom of God verses the Empire (the world). I know that come Saturday afternoon I have to come down from this mountaintop experience and reenter the "real" world. In some ways I am already looking forward to that. There are some real opportunities awaiting me back in the greater Memphis area. I will share more about those in the future.

I also wanted to share a video clip that was used to kick off our evening and worship tonight. It is of Steve Harvey introducing Jesus. It was filmed at Atlanta's Phillips Arena at Bishop T.D. Jakes Megafest and is entilted "Don't Trip...He Ain't Through With Me Yet. I came back to my hotel room tonight and found it online. (Be patient--it may take a minute to load. But trust me it is worth it.)

MUM Marriage Retreat

September 28-30, Amy and I along with Troy and Linda Rodgers attended the 11th annual MUM Marriage Retreat in Gatlinburg, TN. While Amy and I benefited and enjoyed being there, the real story is the Rodgers. Linda Rodgers is one of Wonder City’s Servant Leaders and coordinates all of our mercy ministry. Troy Rodgers on the other hand rarely attends Wonder City or any church event. So, this was a big commitment for him to attend a marriage retreat over three days. I could tell on the van ride to Gatlinburg that Troy was a little nervous about it. Troy is quiet most of the time to begin with, but he was being extra quiet on the way. However, the games on Friday night loosened him up and he admitted that he was enjoying himself. The split session on Saturday’s was a “tear-jerking experience” for Linda and Troy. Both had to speak for two minutes and Linda had to admit that it was hard for her to be quiet during Troy’s two minutes to speak (which he started off by asking to be excused so he could blow his nose). However, when it came time for the couples to read their scripture it was Troy who read for him and Linda (because he wanted to read it). Amy and I spent some time Saturday evening with Troy and Linda walking up and down the main street through Gatlinburg—getting ice cream and fudge together. Both of them were very glad they came and were asking at the end of the weekend when the next marriage retreat is. Linda also said that she believes we will be seeing more of Troy around Wonder City.

Mountain Top Experience

(the following was written by my wife: Amy)

This past weekend Mack and I had the pleasure of attending Memphis Urban Minsitry’s annual marriage retreat. We along with Linda and Troy represented Wonder City at the retreat. While I can’t tell you about the sessions or what was said (because what happens at the marriage retreat stays at the marriage retreat), what a wonderful time it was to be in God’s presence in the mountains at the retreat with the other couples.. In similar style to the song Have you seen Jesus my Lord, “if you have ever stood on a mountaintop looking at the majestic view – then I say you’ve seen Jesus my Lord.” For Linda and Troy this was their first experience seeing mountains and attending a marriage retreat. While I know Linda well, this was my first opportunity to spend time with Troy. I found out that when he is on the 14th floor of a hotel he gets nervous. That his quiet reserve keeps him laid back and peaceful. That once you get to know him, he opens up and shares some of his story. More importantly I found out that he loves to have fun, he loves beautiful scenery, and he truly loves Linda. In spending more time with Linda, I found that she loves looking at the mountains, she loves worship, and she prays for God’s purpose in her life and in her marriage. While I went to the marriage retreat to focus inwardly on my own relationship with God and my relationship with Mack, I found myself taking the time to continue to build relationships with my brothers and sisters at the retreat. This past weekend I experienced a 9 hour van ride to some of the most beautiful country I have ever seen. I experienced what it is like for someone to face their deepest fear, and was able to help that person through my trust and faith in God. I experienced what it is like to see God in the beauty of his creation. I experienced what it is like to strengthen relationships with my brothers and sisters in Christ. I experienced what it is like to be moved by the spirit in worship. More than anything I experienced a deeper relationship with God by taking the time to focus on him in my life. I have stood on the mountain, in awe of the power of God, and prayed to God that he will continue to be my guide on my journey to the Mountain Top of my life. I encourage you to take the time to be still, to admire God’s beauty in people and in your life, to strengthen the relationships with your Christian family and to focus on the opportunities that lie ahead of you to deepen your relationship with God in your service to him.

All Good Things...

All good things must come to an end. Isn’t that how the expression goes? For the past two weeks I have been gone on vacation trying my absolute hardest not even to think about Wonder City or ministry. But here it is my first day back at work in two weeks. In some ways I am sad about that. I was enjoying my vacation and sitting at home doing absolutely nothing. On the other hand, I am glad to be back at work. Back doing what God has called me to do. Back to having purpose and direction for my days.

Someone asked me today if I have ever taken two weeks like that before. I never had. Almost ten years in ministry and over six years at Wonder City and I have never taken two straight weeks. That points to one of my issues—I am a workaholic. Not that I work 80 hours a week. But I will work multiple days and not take my days off. I will go and go and look back and realize that I have worked 28 out of 31 days in a month. That simply is not healthy. My workaholism comes out of a need for people’s approval. (“Look how hard Mack is working. He is doing such a good job.”) I am learning balance in my life and that I don’t have to be a workaholic to have people like me.

God created that balance. He gave Adam and Eve work (before the fall). Their job was to tend to the garden. But God also gave rest—he called it Sabbath. Jesus said, “The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath.” God knows we need rest. God knows that many of us will not rest unless we are made too. God had brought me to a place where I had to rest. I am thankful for that rest. I am also thankful for what I am learning about balance.

Paying Attention

This week I have had several people asking me what happened to my head (I have sore right in the middle of my forehead). Sunday afternoon I was in Kroger picking up a few grocery items. I had just come from playing basketball with a group of friends from church. I was hot, sweaty, and very tired. One of the items that I needed was on the next to bottom shelf and on the back of the shelf. When I bent over to pick one up I banged my head on an impulse buy rack attached to the edge of the shelf a couple shelves up. It was clear hard plastic and I didn’t even see it until after it was too late. My head started bleeding and I quickly got what I needed and checked out. I was very thankful no employee asked me if I was ok, asked to fill out an incident report, or sign something stating I would not sue.

However, this got me thinking about how often I (and others) don’t pay attention. I can’t tell you how many times in a week I say the expression “if it was a snake it would have bit me/you” about an object right under my or someone else’s nose.

What I wonder most about is the number of things that God puts right under our nose that we miss. How many opportunities to practice some form of Christian service because we are only focused on ourselves, where we are going, and we have to get done? How many opportunities to share an encouraging word with a brother or sister who is down? How many opportunities to serve someone in need? How many opportunities to share Jesus with a non-believer? I truly hope that we are not so focused on ourselves that these missed opportunities come back to bite us (Matthew 25:31-46).

School Store & Denpendency

This week we held our annual back to school supply giveaway. We had 125 parents come through and pick up supplies for over 350 students. The few leftover supplies were donated to Maddox Elementary School.

This week’s school supply giveaway—while a great service to our community—has allowed me some time to reflect on the subject of dependency. One reason is that I knew there would be people whom I never see except for at our giveaways who would walk through our doors yesterday. Additionally, we have had one of our founding families recently walk away due to the churches’ unwillingness to continue to support their dependency issues. It breaks my heart when I see people who are so dependent on others they will do nothing for themselves. It takes a lot of work and a lot of time to break the cycles of poverty and dependency. However, it is possible. While at the School Store on Thursday I heard a success story. A young lady who attended WC as a teenager (but hasn’t been around for about 4 years) will be entering her senior year at University of Central Arkansas (Conway) next week. She will graduate next spring with a teacher’s degree. She has also made it this far without having a baby. In fact her family member who was giving me this information told me that she said, “I don’t have time for a baby.” I don’t know to what extent the time she was at Wonder City has helped her achieve her life goals and break some of those cycles of dependency for herself (and hopefully her children). However, what I do know is that it is possible.

Young Men Stepping Up

For the past couple of months a couple of guys have been coming on Wednesday nights and teaching our teen boys. This past week one of them informed me that they have been talking about leadership, specifically as it relates to leading in the worship services. This past Wednesday he went through each part of the worship service and asked which of our young men could lead in that area of worship. Most have already been doing things like prayer, scripture reading, and passing Lord’s Supper. So they had no problem saying they could do those things. However, when it came to the areas of preaching and leading worship our young men were slower to respond. However, eventually someone did step up and say that was an area they could lead in. As a result, we are now planning on our young men completely leading our worship service on Sunday, August 5th. We are also looking into them going to Earle, AR (about 15 minutes from West Memphis) and leading their evening worship service on a Sunday evening. Please be praying for our young men as they prepare and lead services, August 5th. I will let you know how it goes.

NACC, Live from KC

Last week I attended the North American Christian Church Convention in Kansas City. This was probably been the best convention that I have ever attended. The Independent Christian Churches know how to do a convention. I learned so much from the classes. Even the exhibitors were great. I gained so much from them, including some new ideas to try in urban ministry.

However, the largest benefit from being there last week was the personal renewal. It was good just to be away from the daily routine of ministry, the pressures, the tasks, the crisis, and spend some time being fed. I came to the conference ready to leave full-time paid ministry. I was ready to transition to another career (I have been thinking education). However, even after the opening session on Tuesday evening I was hearing God’s call on my life to stay in ministry.

The amazing thing behind all of this is, that a few weeks ago, I started sharing with Amy about changing careers and investigating what it would take to get a non-traditional certification to teach Jr. and Sr. High Social Studies and History. She responded by saying something about my stress level and even burnout, having carried the load at Wonder City alone for the past 11 months. I don’t remember her exact words, but whatever they were it was not what I wanted to hear. I did not get the supportive wife that I was looking for. I wanted her to say, “Honey, if that is what you believe God is calling you to, then I will support you one-hundred percent. How can I help you?” Now I believe she was probably right (as much as I hate to admit that). In fact, there have been several times throughout our marriage that I believe she has been closer to the heart of God and in tune with what God wanted for us than I was. (For those of you who don’t know that is a hard fact for a pastor to accept).

I know that I will be right back where I was at in a very short time if two things don’t change. First, and most importantly, I have to change. I have to return home and do some things differently. There are many things that I have the ability to change, which have the potential to affect my sanity and stability in ministry. If I return to West Memphis and don’t do things differently then how can expect a different result. I have heard the definition of insanity as doing the same things over and over again expecting a different result. If I want something different, then I must do something different. And I want something different.

Second, I do need ministry help at Wonder City (and soon)! No matter how many things I change, ministry (and especially urban ministry) is not meant to be done alone. Jesus surrounded himself with twelve disciples. When he sent them out he didn’t send them out alone. He sent them two by two (Mark 6:7). I need my ministry partner. Thankfully, God has recently sent a couple of prospects my (our) way that I have engaged at various levels, for different roles at Wonder City. It is my hope that God will actually provide one of these individuals (if not two or more).

Thank you, Father, for this time of renewal and reflection. May you continue to bless me and Wonder City.

Uplift

This week I am at Uplift (a Christian camp at Harding University; ) with teens from Wonder City and Missouri Street. It has been 11 years since I was last at Uplift. I came last (and for the first time) back in 1996 when I was a summer intern in south Arkansas. It was the summer between my freshman and sophomore years of college. I only brought 3 kids with me. This time it is a little different. Wonder City has 17 youth here this week. Combined with the MOST group there are over 70 teens and sponsors here. Needless to say, things are a little different.

However, our teens are having a blast. They are loving the free time and learning a lot. Like other youth groups we have had our nuckelhead moments. But it has been stuff that has been realatively minor.

However, the best part about Uplift so far has been the connection to the teens. Kyle (Missouri Street youth minister) told me several times about how it is the best thing he does all summer because of the way kids open up and talk about the junk in their lives and the sins they are struggling with during this week. I have been amazed at how true that has been with the Wonder City kids as well. This week (so far) at least three students have shared deeply with me from their hearts about stuff going on. This is stuff that they have NEVER shared with anyone else. Additionally, the kids have been sharing their angers and other emotions they don't get to share back at home. It has truly been a blessed week.

I have lots of pictures to upload when I get home and will share some of those and further reflections later this week.

Memphis Workcamp 2007

I am continually amazed at our young people’s willingness to serve. This week Wonder City had 10 teens (plus my sister) who joined the 17 from Missouri Street by working in the hot muggy weather at Memphis Workcamp painting houses. Here are some pictures from the week.

Addicted

Addicted is a word that is typically not associated with positive attributes. We typically associate addictions as harmful, negative, and devastating aspects of a habit that can not easily be reversed. Recently, I have been a witness to the positive side of being addicted. For a couple of weeks now there has been a ladies class on Monday night called “More than Sisters” at Missouri Street Church. Several Wonder City Members have become part of this class. While I have planned to attend, I have yet to have the opportunity. However, I have received phone calls about the “addictiveness” of this class. Phrases like “Oooh, you need to come to this class,” and “I can’t believe how I love going to this class,” are spoken as encouragement for others at Wonder City to attend. Last Wednesday night, the ladies that are attending were so pumped up, they were excited about being able to share, laugh, and learn about God in a way that is truly focused on Women in Christ, who struggle in today’s world. Linda even stated that she was going to hate missing a class, but in the event that she missed, she would get the materials from anyone who is willing to share. She even stated that she herself is “addicted” to this class. Being able to bring ladies, of all ages and backgrounds, together is an awesome thing. I know that every Monday night, God looks down and smiles because his power is creating an addiction that is positive and it is consuming the ladies at Wonder City who have made the decision to be “More than Sisters.”

Written by: Amy McFarland

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One of the amazing aspects of this ladies class on Monday nights has been the Acts 2:42-47 nature of the class. It has been reported to me that one of the things the class hopes to do is take care of the needs within the class. Participants have the opportunity to write prayer requests and needs on a card. Then as the class has the means and ability to address the needs, they are taken care of. Last week—right as Amy and I were preparing to leave for vacation—the class facilitator called me and told me they were going to take care of a need that a Wonder City participant had. This is an older lady who lives in an old apartment that does not have central heat and air. Her window AC unit had gone out. She put on her prayer card that God would provide an AC. The group from the class found not one, but two units for her. When they called to set up delivery, they discovered they were too late. God had already provided two units through a family member. God showed up and he showed out! This is just the tip of the iceberg of what I have been hearing that God is doing through this group of ladies. True Christian community is being formed and is having an impact.